Today was the “2013 International Fruitcake Eating Championship” in Santa Claus, Indiana. We first reported on this annual event in 2009. The fact that this continues to go on year after year is astonishing. More incredible is the fact that contestants will subject themselves to this endurance test more than once.
Imagine the mental training that goes into such a competition. The first, and hardest, step is getting to the point where one can actually put the fruitcake in his mouth. Unlike The Amazing Race, where contestants will eat vile things in the hopes of winning a million dollars, contestants in the International Fruitcake Eating Contest are awarded a simple trophy for finishing with the fastest time.
Reports indicate that 10 people attempted to finish a one-pound fruitcake. One contestant was WWE Hall of Famer Mick Foley. As a man trained to endure physical punishment, he should have won. As it turns out, he didn’t actually eat all the fruitcake, choosing to hide it in pockets and under a napkin instead. This put him in fourth place, with all the other fourth place winners. Evidently, just attempting to ingest the 1440 calories of “fruit”, nuts, and “cake” is worthy of a prize. There are no losers here. Well, actually, they all ate fruitcake, so they all lost.
There is no reason to go to these extremes, just to dispose of a fruitcake. Just send it to us, and we’ll recycle it responsibly.
Remember: This Christmas, we beg you:
Don’t bake a fruitcake.
Don’t buy a fruitcake.
If you happen upon a fruitcake, please regift, reuse, or recycle it.
Working together, we can save the planet, one fruitcake at a time.