This is by far, not just the weirdest fruitcake song ever, but the most disturbing fruitcake video we’ve ever seen. From The Superions’ new Christmas album, Destination… Christmas!

Sing along! Here’s the lyrics:

Chorus:
What you making?
Fruitcake!
What you baking?
Fruitcake!
Candied cherries, red dye number two,
Green cherries?
Green ones too!
It’s fruitcake!
It’s fruitcake!

Pecans or walnuts,
Citrus peel, lots of stuff,
Add what you feel!
Sticks of butter, cinnamon,
Mo-molasses, lots of dark rum,
Artificial color, artificial flavor,
If your family don’t want it,
Give it to a neighbor!
It’s fruitcake!
It’s fruitcake!

Chorus

A little bit of mace,
The stuff they spray in your face?
Oh no, you sillies!
It’s a spice for taste!
Put the oven on low,
Three hours or mo
Wrap it in rum…
Yum, yum, yum,
Fruitcake!

Fruit cake!
Heavy as lead.
Fruitcake!
If it hits in the head!
Fruit cake!
It could kill you dead!
It’s Fruitcake!
Yeah, fruitcake!
Artificial color, artificial flavor.
If your family don’t want it,
Give it to a neighbor!
Fruitcake!
Yeah fruitcake!

Chorus

Do the fruitcake…
Don’t call me fruitcake…
What’s the fruitcake…
Hey fruitcake…
You’re a fruitcake…
Dummy fruitcake…